Friday 17 January 2014

I Never Thought.....

I never thought that I would live to see forty-three. I never thought I would be married for so many years, twenty-one to be exact. I never thought I would be blessed with two beautiful boys. I never thought I would out live my Father, his Brother and their Mother. But I have.

These are thoughts that have been trickling through the think tank today. I know it's been another long while since my last entry and the only excuse I have is that I just didn't have a desire to write one. Remember how I've mentioned that Winter makes me miserable and that I tend to hibernate and hide away once the cold comes calling?, well it's all true!. For now I am back and anxious to empty the mind grounds. On December 30th 2013 the head of my family passed away peacefully with some of us flocked at her side. She suffered for many years having two broken hips, cancer and no use of her legs.It was a welcome passing. For nine and a half years she lived in a nursing home. Thankfully it was a wonderful one and the staff treated her with such kindness and caring. My Grandmother, Memeness as I called her, was a strong willed, very family oriented female. Always wanting to know where each of her chickens were and what they were doing. She was happiest when we were all together with her at the helm, cooking, caring and cleaning for each of us.She had a pleasing pride about her and was not what you'd call a "peacekeeper" but she instilled that in her children and some of her Grandchildren. Louise lost her Father to tuberculosis at the tender age of eight and helped her Mother care for her siblings. They were five in total and from the stories I am told, she locked horns with her Mother as I did with her. In June of 1942 she married the man she loved and their family started with my Father being born the following year in March. They went on to have three more children but Eugene (Pepe) lived a short life and passed away in 1976 when their youngest was only fourteen. From then on she would be the soul shoulder we would all lean on.

My parents divorced when my Sister and I were just wee ones and she happily took on the role of raising us both. Almost from my earliest memory, I gave Meme grief on most everything. Never did I just listen and behave as I should, always trying to edge every angle she came at me with. Though we had a wonderful childhood, that's not how I would have described it at that time. Thinking back to when I would make her mad still has me amazed that I hold all my own teeth in my mouth. Boy did we argue!..hehe. My Sister on the other hand was an easy going, bubbly, happy little girl and never cared for the likes of confrontation, she still doesn't. I am grateful we were so different, it just might be the one thing that saved my backside. Meme was always doing something as I recall and it was usually being done for someone else. To this day her baking is the best I have ever experienced and was matched by no one. She died undefeated in so many ways. Some of my best memories were of our whole family together for Summer tent sleeps under the stars. May 2-4 weekend and then Labour Day bbq with a television being brought out to the back alley for everyone to watch the Jerry Lewis telethon. Those were indeed special times and sparks marvelous memories within me. We didn't have twenty-four hour a day kid channels or even one channel that you could watch kids shows on daily. We got our cartoon fix on Saturday and Sunday mornings. When family weekends came around though, none of us cared about watching T.V, all we wanted to do was play, eat junk food and stay up late with the elders in the family. Getting to sleep in tents with our Cousins was always a welcome treat. Meme would spend most of the time preparing piles of food and would only come join us by the fire briefly when all the work was done. As one woman she could do more than ten I know now. I never thought I would have such love, respect and gratitude for the woman that raised me but I sure do. Did I mention the neighbourhood fireworks display her and the family next door would hold?. Spectacular it was!. Every year of our childhood Meme and the contributing neighbours would buy what seemed like a field of fireworks and invite anyone that wanted to attend. She would spend hours preparing goodies and a huge garbage bag filled with popcorn to share with everyone present. At one of those fireworks displays, I received my first kiss and was only twelve. The sky wasn't the only thing lit up that night, think I walked on clouds for a week after that. Other occasions also bring back beautiful memories. Boating over to Peche Island is one. Meme would pack up coolers of food and away we'd go to spend the day splashing, fishing and pretending. On the island was an old house foundation left standing, we imagined it was our home and we would play house for hours with our Cousins. If I am certain of nothing in life, there is one thing I am sure of. My love for sleeping outdoors and swimming, stem directly from those marvelous memories of days gone by.

Though Meme wasn't the one who gave birth to me. She is the one who had the biggest hand in raising me and I will always be grateful for what her and our Father taught us. We had a good balance of ease and friction in our early years. Meme was stern and ran a tight ship, while Daddy was softer sided and always swabbed the decks for us...haha!. If the Big Guy allows it, I will always have these magnificent memories to look back on and share with everyone. Last time I checked, I still have all my marbles intact even if they are a bit mixed up. In ending this entry I would just like to say, never say NEVER because what will be we can't have control over. The biggest lesson I still learn from Memeness was one of forgiveness. I found it with her many years ago and try to teach my children how important it is to have that with others. We all screw up and need forgiveness for each other to remain content with ourselves. Nothing good ever comes from negativity!!. Okay well those are enough words of wisdom from me, for now. Thanks for reading what's in the mind grounds and may this day find you in a well way.


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